Drunk Aichi's Midnight Rampage
by YandereOverload
Summary: A small adventure of a drunken Aichi in Kai's apartment. Don't underestimate him, a drunken Aichi can cause more trouble than you think. KaiChi! One-shot.


**Drunk!**

**Disclaimer: ** I OWN NOTHING FROM CARDFIGHT! VANGUARD

**Pairing: **Kai x Aichi…kinda…

* * *

"Kai-kunnnn!" Aichi called out, as he banged his fists on Kai's door repeatedly, "Kai-kunn, let me innnnn…"

Kai opened the door, as Aichi stumbled inside, giggling.

Booze. Kai could smell booze. And Aichi's face was red.

Aichi was definitely drunk.

"Aichi," Kai gave him a horrified look, "What happened?"

"It doesn't matter, Kai-kunnnnnn" Aichi slurred his words, grabbing Kai's shirt, "Nothing matters in this world but youuu…"

"Aichi!" Kai pulled away, blushing, "What the hell happened?!"

"Welll…." Aichi giggled, "I don't actually remember muchhh…"

"Aichi –"

"Kai-kunnn, I can't let Emi see me this wayyyy…" Aichi pulled Kai closer, decreasing the distance between them, "So let me stayyyy…just tonightttt…."

"No."

"But Kai…" Aichi inched his face closer, "Please? You know how Emi is like…and my motherrrr –"

"Fine," Kai rolled his eyes, unable to just kick Aichi out of his house, "Don't make much trouble then."

Aichi nodded.

But Kai didn't realize how much trouble a drunken Aichi would bring.

Which is a lot.

* * *

Aichi opened his eyes, wincing as he sat up. His head hurts…

He looked around in the unfamiliar room.

Where am I? He wondered.

He craned his head to the right and saw…

Kai. Sleeping.

And Naked.

Aichi looked down at himself, finding he is also –

"KAI-KUNNNNN!?" Aichi shrieked, his mind in chaos, shaking the brunette repeatedly, "WHAT HAPPENED?! DID WE JUST…MAKE BABIES?!"

Kai rubbed his eyes, and yawned. "Yes we did. Last night. And we can't actually make babies because we are both male."

"KAI-KUN WHAT HAPPENED?!" Aichi yelled.

"Geez, don't be so loud so early in the morning…" Kai grumbled, as he sat up, "You came here drunk yesterday."

"But how did it end up like this…?"

"Here's the whole story," Kai mumbled, "First you came in and you started blabbering about how you wanted to be a sunflower. And you asked me to water you, which I refused. So you screamed at me and you poured water on yourself. After that, you opened a window and shrieked, '_'I NEED SUNLIGHT! I HAVE TO PHOTOSYNTHESIS!'_ When I tried to pull you back inside, you said that I was just jealous that you are a better sunflower than I am. When I finally convinced you are not a Sunflower, you started saying that you are a tulip instead."

"…Did I really?!" Aichi gasped.

"That's not all," Kai continued, shaking his head, "After you got over the I-am-a plant thing, you climbed into the freezer, and said that you want to find Santa in the North Pole. You wedged yourself inside so deep that it took me some time to pull you out."

Aichi stared at Kai, horrified. "_SANTA_?!"

"Yes," Kai pulled Aichi's hand up, showing a frostbite mark at his palm, "See?"

"Jesus…" Aichi buried his face in his hands, "What happened next?"

"After I pulled you out, you started banging your head on the coffee table…" Kai choked, "And you said that you want to make the world a better place, and you started do, uh, pole dancing with no pole…uh, and you started stripping…and…"

Kai's voice trailed away.

"And what?" Aichi demanded.

"You said that you wanted to be a Popsicle, and you asked me to shove a stick up your ass…When I didn't, you made this erotic face, saying, _'But doesn't Kai-kun want to lick me? I taste good, you know? I am a popsicle!'_. Then you raped me. Well, not exactly."

"WHAT?!" Aichi's face flushed red. "I…Wait, not exactly rape? What do you mean…?"

"Rape isn't rape if you enjoyed it," Kai shrugged, "And I would never let you be on top."

Aichi groaned. "Kai-kun…"

"If you're going to apologize, do me a favor and don't," Kai smirked, "It was a memorable night. Besides, I can use this to blackmail you."

"Kai-kun!" Aichi pouted, and picked his shirt from the floor, "How mean!"

As Aichi got dressed, Kai was silently laughing at his face.

Well, if you actually got drunk and did these things in front of your crush…

…You'd be making the same face as Aichi's.

It's priceless, really.

"Aichi," Kai cooed, "Your attempted rape last night, was it out of love or out of temporarily lust?"

"D-Don't tease me like that!" Aichi threw Kai's underwear to the owner's face.

"Aw come on, I'm being serious!" Kai kept his usual cool expression on his face, "I'm not smiling."

"Idiot," Aichi muttered, blushing.

As Aichi was going to walk out of the door, he turned back to Kai, and winked, "Call me?"

* * *

**I rushed this, I'm sorry ehehe**

**I should be sleeping but I finished it!**

**Remember; don't let a drunken Aichi come into your house.**

**Or maybe you should…if you want to take advantage of him/slapped**


End file.
